How To Have An Optimistic Valentine’s Day

One of my favorite holidays is Valentine’s Day because it’s a day fully dedicated to celebrating loving and liking. But what if you’re single, unhappily single, struggling dating, or separated by distance from your loved one/s?

How to be Optimistic on Valentine’s Day


Decide what today is about for you. Is it about your partner/s? Your friends? Yourself? Define Valentine’s Day for yourself. Try to separate what other people tell you Valentine’s Day is about, with what you want it to be about.


Design your day. Start your morning with a list of things that you can control. I will take some time with the paper and a coffee. I will get myself a Valentine’s Day card and write everything I love about myself in it. I will surround myself with the friends that make me feel most safe, loved, cared for. I will go see a movie by myself because I’m the only person maybe in my state who hasn’t seen Lady Bird yet.

Just the basics.


Don’t think about what COULD happen. Focus on what HAS happened. Disappointment comes from set expectations that other people are meant to fulfill but only you knew about. Angry or sad feelings can spiral and ruin the day before it’s even begun and those feelings can carry beyond the fourteenth into the rest of this short month. Let the little things go.


The comedown is real. Try to keep whatever you had going on Valentine’s Day going through the rest of the year. Flowers are for Tuesdays. Chocolate is for Wednesdays. Greeting cards can show up any time. And date night, that’s recurring, put it in the books. To kick the Valentine’s Blues, suck and spit the consumerism, and find a better purpose.

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