What is advice?
Advice is a recommendation about what someone should do based on a set amount of information.
When I give advice I combine (1) my knowledge about a situation with (2) filtered through my own bias and (2) the information given to me about that situation.
It’s really difficult to give advice without imparting your own bias! That’s because your bias impacts how you see the entire world. My goal for every post is to try and think about the situation outside of what I would do, and think about what that person could do or what would be healthiest to do.
How does advice work?
- Give the advice-giver as much information as you can about your situation and what you’re looking to receive from the advice. Include as much information as you’re comfortable with and any information you think might be relevant.
- When you read the advice, remember that it’s going to be biased, and based only on the information you’ve given the advice-giver.
- Take that advice into consideration. Ask someone else for advice. Remember that it’s just one person’s advice.
When asking for advice, the advice-asker usually has some idea of what they want to do.
SHOULD YOU TAKE MY ADVICE?
I don’t believe you should take advice. Advice isn’t a guidebook, advice is a set of suggestions. When someone gives advice they aren’t fully aware of the entire situation.
Advice may create a visceral reaction. There may be an instinctive pull towards one answer or the other.
The advice-asker might think this advice is wrong or this advice was helpful. Either way, the advice has done the job by assisting in strengthening your intuition or guiding you towards a more appropriate response.
The benefit of asking for advice often
If you’ve ever been on an advice message board, you might have noticed that a lot of people asking for advice have let their situation advance quite a bit. For example, if they are in a relationship that is unhappy, they’ve likely been unhappy for a long time before asking for advice. A lot of the time people only ask for advice after they’ve already made up their mind about a a particular situation.
They know what they should do or they know what feels right or wrong, but they want someone to give them permission to say out loud how they feel.
It can be scary asking for advice before you need it because it forces you to confront and work through issues you’re having in your life.
Asking for advice frequently can be useful if you remember that advice is not a set of guidelines. Use advice (or therapy, or counseling) to help guide you towards making better decisions that are all. yours. Confronting issues like this often and with heart can make you stronger, wiser, and happier.
Do you need advice about sex or love? Submit now at [Ask Suggestive] and I’ll answer on my blog.