In traditional couples therapy, which is about 50 years old, sex has often been shoved to the sideline. Practitioners are trained to work on underlying relationship issues, like blame or communication, many discussing sex only if the couple wants to talk about it. But in the last decade, as coupledom itself has been legally redefined, a chorus of provocative voices in couples therapy has emerged, emphasizing the importance of good sex in relationships and sometimes suggesting the radical idea that couples fix the sex before tackling other issues.
Gaslighting does not require deliberate plotting. Gaslighting only requires a belief that it is acceptable to overwrite another person’s reality. The rest just happens organically when a person who holds that belief feels threatened. We learn how to control and manipulate each other very naturally. The distinguishing feature between someone who gaslights and someone who doesn’t, is an internalized paradigm of ownership.
The Aftermath Of Bill Cosby’s Admission? That’s Rape Culture.
The fact Cosby’s leaked confession holds more weight than the voices of over 40 women who have come out with accusations against him over the years, is horrifying. We needed “proof” before we could believe the victims.
I find it very comforting to be physically close to a partner, which can include holding hands, hugging, cuddling, and kissing. These actions are an expression or an extension of emotional intimacy, and they feel good. They just don’t have any connection to a desire to see someone naked or have sex with them.
Our role as therapists is to offer our gender-exploring and gender-nonconforming child patients empathy, understanding, respectful listening, and informed expertise as we help them explore and articulate who they are. Our job is never to simply rubber stamp whatever a child who initially shares about their gender, no questions asked.