Poll Results: What makes sex hard?

Thanks to everyone who participated in my last poll! The question was what do you struggle with most in your relationship? The intent of this poll was to see what made sex most difficult for you and your partner. A friend of mine pointed out that I didn’t include “everything is awesome” as a possible choice. This was actually an accident. I had intended to focus primarily on the idea that everyone struggles sometimes. It doesn’t matter how often you struggle or if you’re currently struggling. Sometimes you’re too tired. Sometimes you’re too busy. Life happens. Here are the results.

Most of you voted that you just didn’t like sex the same amount. Your partner liked it more or less than you did, and that influenced how often you had sex. The two results with the second highest number of votes were also about time. Finding enough time to have sex, or not being turned on at the same time.

These results say something pretty interesting. Solo sex (masturbation) is easy because it revolves around you and your schedule. Any sort of partnered sex is more difficult because you have to match up your partners libido with your libido and your partners schedule with your schedule. Those things aren’t always easy.

I had a few fill in responses, one which I should have thought of: having enough privacy. If you don’t live alone or with your significant other, or if you have kids, this can be a big one!

Even if we exclude things like time crunches, having privacy, and liking sex the same amount, there are still a lot of things that can make sex hard. Some people struggle getting aroused. Some people struggle with actual pleasure. Some people have mental or physical issues that have pushed sex from being a priority. Some people, indeed, are single, and either don’t focus on sex or cannot find a partner.

Do you have any tips for conquering these issues? If you voted in the poll, have you had success in combating some of the time issues or arousal issues with your partner?

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