Thoughts on Polyamory

A news site posts an article about polyamory, here are some of the negative comments on the post about it. Though there were a handful of positive comments, these negative ones I pulled are reflective of how many people view polyamory. (I also pulled some that highlighted confusion about polyamory.) No commentary, just reflection.

  • Polyamory: a fancy way of saying promiscuous narcissist.
  • How about not being so friggin self-absorbed and needy? Your partner won’t be everything you expect, or want, but neither are you. Be happy with less and learn to be content, we don’t get everything and it’s an absurdity that we should expect to. Polyamory the alternative? Please.
  • You mean fucking around? Are we being fancy about it? Call it what you want, but that’s what it is. Nothing new about it either.
  • The only thing I find puzzling is where one finds the time!
  • Uh, I think this is why we have friends.
  • Just keep in mind that historically, financially, and legally; women have never fared well under polygamy.
  • What a bunch of self-involved bullshit. Is it really a healthy idea to drag a bunch of emasculated intellectuals (who obviously have mommy issues) into a situation where they’re all competing for whatever attention you choose to dole out to them?
  • This has been over-analyzed and had some big words pasted onto it. They are just fuck-buddies, c’mon.
  • Hole in one, two or three. STD ?
  • isn’t it complicated enough to establish a relationship with one person let alone to branch out into polyamory? it’s not just about platonic relationships either, and who has the libido and the energy to maintain all those ties? Only an empty vessel needs another person to fulfill it’s emptiness
  • If you believe this then you’ve chosen a life partner poorly. The feeling if being “completed” by someone else is hard to explain. If you’re in a monogamous relationship and you can’t even comprehend the concept or think having a “soulmate” is bullshit then you’re with the wrong person.
  • what about kids that get raised say by 3 women with low self worth competing for one man and they learn that polygamy is the way to go because they’re brainwashed to learn they aren’t worth more than that ?? this is usually how Polyamory goes doesn’t it ?
  • I don’t know if I like the “Polyamory” term, but I like the idea. Non-traditonal relationships.
  • Um, don’t get married if you want lots of women. Simple. I sure don’t think any men would tolerate being in a haream if they were really in love with the woman, wondering who she is going to do it with tonight or in the morning. Thinking how many hours it has been since someone else hit it.
  • Sounds like a nicer way of justifying being a “ho”
  • Never works. I have seen so many friends and acquaintances attempt an “alternate” way from traditional marriage, it has always come to a sad end.
  • Polyamory = You don’t want to be married (duh). Just stay single.

7 Comments Add yours

  1. Horia says:

    It’s pathetic how many people confuse polyamory with polygamy.

    It’s a sombering testament to the brainwashing power of western culture when you see how these people aren’t even aware that our ancestors were polyamorous for millions of years before religion and the particular form of property exchange called marriage came along.


    1. ST says:

      Isn’t it? Very frustrating. Not only are the two very different, but they are founded in different beliefs, and history.


  2. Still 'in the closet' says:

    It is comments like these that keep me very quiet about my relationship status.

    Polyamory is beautiful, but not for everyone. However, I do think we live in a society where, justified or not, there is a feeling of ‘if I accept this, then it means I must be open to it in my own life,’ when really all that’s needed is acceptance and an attempt at understanding.

    Mono didn’t work for me and my ‘primary’. Poly may not work for those who are mono. Lets just respect our differences and enjoy seeing the vastness this life has to offer 🙂


    1. ST says:

      I was “socially monogamous” when I was open. Most people didn’t know I was open unless they were in my inner circle, and we mostly behaved monogamously, whatever that means.

      I very much agree with your second sentence.


  3. meggsy says:

    Rubbish – probably only the last two items are the closest I have experienced in my experiences.
    There is no way I will be changing.


    1. ST says:

      All kinds of relationships end, all the time. If you want to be single, that’s a reasonable choice. I agree.


  4. Brandon says:

    Reading this post made me sad, because it’s the way far too many people see poly.

    Just the other day I was having a conversation with a friend about it, and she said something like, “So it’s really just about having a bunch of friends with benefits, right?”

    I wish I had the right words to fully explain it to someone that isn’t poly themselves, but it’s hard.


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