I enjoy being choked during sex, and my boyfriend and I are both comfortable with it. The other night he was choking me and suddenly I got a really intense headache. The same sharp headache came back the following day. Did the choking cause this? And how?

When you’re experimenting with breath play in the bedroom it is exceptionally important that you know what you’re doing. You’re restricting the air flow of someone that you, presumably, care a lot about. That’s not to say that everyone out there who experiments with breath play is going to cause problems, but if you don’t know what you’re doing it can cause problems. That means if breath play for you means “I’m going to put my arm around my partners neck because it will be exciting” you need to stop, and re-evaluate. There are some things you need to know about where to press, how hard to press, and what to look for. The best reference I’ve found for that are Tristan Taormino’s videos. The Expert Guide To Rough Sex is a good one. So is the Expert Guide To Advanced Anal Sex. I’m pretty sure that each of these videos includes bonus footage of how to properly do breath play. I can’t recall any other sources I trust for this kind of information, so if anyone has reliable resources please link them in the comment box.

As for the headache, I would make an appointment to see a doctor. It’s better to play it safe in this case, if only so you can make certain everything is A-OK. I can’t say for certain if the chocking caused the headache, but it seems like the two could definitely be related. Play it safe, read up on how to experiment with rougher sex, and always get a professional opinion if something happens that concerns you.