Absolutely.

First off I want to state the obvious though, I’m of the other kind of genitalia. I do not have a penis and therefore I open the comments up to those who do have one to give their own advice and personal experience with this. I’m sure many of you will have more intimate details that I don’t know about.

Onward to what I do know;

1. Work the base
Practice gripping the base of your cock tightly once it becomes erect. I find this works better if you make a ring with your fingers and press down a bit. Playing with your balls at the same time can add some extra bonus points. If you don’t want to keep your hand down there or it gets in the way pick up a cock-ring. A good cock ring will fit comfortably without making you feel suffocated but will still feel a little snug. A cock-ring will hold more blood in your erect penis making it more stiff.

2. Work your mind
The more aroused you are the more aroused your love-stick will get. Get your head into the game. Think dirty kinky things that make you go boing when you’re on your own. That brings me to another important point.

Sometimes guys have no problem getting (and staying) hard by themselves but when they get to being with someone else it becomes more difficult. The reasons can be vast but generally revolve around the need to perform, a bit of nervousness, or focusing more on pleasing their partner than themselves. My advice would be to slow down and focus on foreplay. Focus on what makes you feel good. Communicate with your partner and just do what it takes to make you hard with no pressure. Know if you don’t stay hard that’s fine and you can please her instead. Just have fun. You shouldn’t need to stress out about anything and when you realize that– things will cum easier.

Questions to –> suggestivetongue@gmail.com

I have to be reminded constantly that not everyone knows the length of the anus or the difference between vaginal lubrication and discharge. What asexual means in terms of sexuality and in terms of reproduction. I have to remind myself that I’m a little obsessed and there are people out there that might not even realize these things exist.

How educated do you feel about sex? Think about it for a second. Is there anything that comes to mind that you can honestly admit you don’t know very much about? Is it something you want to know more about? Do you like not knowing some things or do you want to be more informed but don’t know what it is you need to be more informed about?

As always, if you have any sex-questions or need advice email me at suggestivetongue@gmail.com.

I’ll answer any question to the best of my ability.

I know I personally take very little time to slow down and life moves very fast. I am currently emailing back and forth with about four people and I’ve gotten to know them a lot better and it’s been really fun. If you’re interested, please email. No excuses! No “I bet she’s already gotten enough, I could but I dunno, I don’t want to seem weird, what would I say…” It’s okay, It’ll be okay. Look forward to hearing from you and look forward to getting back to blogging soon.

Things that have made me laugh during sex:

1. Queefing

There is no denying it, queefing is awkward. It’s not only awkward, it’s hilarious. For those of you who aren’t in the know, a queef is essentially a vagina fart. Too much air gets pushed into the vagina and when it comes out it makes a fart-like sound. Queefing is especially common with girl on top when air gets pressed in. You might be queefing for a while, after that. What men don’t know (and never will) is that queefing not only sounds strange but feels very strange as well. This is just another reason why it will (almost certainly) send me into a fit of giggles.

2. Disney movies

Have you ever had sex while watching a Disney movie, or a movie of equally strange background noise? If you have, you understand why this one is also giggle worthy. The next time you’re in the sheets and Simba starts singing I just can’t wait to be king all of a sudden nothing in that movie will ever be sacred every again.

3. Falling off the bed

So you’re thrusting, thrusting, thrusting, and all of a sudden you’ve done a backflip off the bed and you’re laying halfway in the bathroom butt naked covered in jizz. These things happen.

4. The blood rushing to my head

Along the same lines, if you’re being pushed off the bed and your head flops over all the blood goes to your head. The giggling resulted from this might not be of your choice.

5. Cum in strange places

How did cum get behind my ears? I don’t know, but it’s hilarious.

6. Breaking expensive things

In the midst of a large deep thrust my brand new macbook slid off the bed onto the hardwood floor and dented, making the battery fall all the way out. It kept playing music so we kept going, giggling about how much trouble we’d just caused with our fucking. That’s life, isn’t it? What’s done is done. Laugh and keep fucking.

7. Slippage

Off a cock, over boobs into chin, into asshole… it’s only not funny when it’s surprise buttsex.

8. Awkward sex positions

I’ve tried plenty.

9. Waterfall/Cumfall

Waterfall: When you are having sex in the tub or a hot tub and you stand up afterwards and all the water falls out of your vagina.

Cumfall: After you have sex and all of the cum runs down your legs as you try to escape to the bathroom.

10. Ticklish butt

Don’t judge me.

What makes you laugh during sex?

Your brain goes through the same processes in a break-up as it does with death. You have to learn how to live without someone who was very close to you, and perhaps someone you even depended on daily if your relationship was very serious. Read books on grief and apply them the best you can to the feelings you’re having. You can try to follow the basic five stages of grief if that helps.

Denial:
We’ll be together again, I know we will. We’re meant for each other.

Anger:
I can’t believe they’re doing this to me. Why are they being so cruel?

Bargaining:
I will be such a better girlfriend if they just give me one more chance, just one more chance. I’ll do anything for another chance.

Depression:
I am never going to find someone else like them. They were the perfect boyfriend. Who else is going to do the things they did for me?

Acceptance:
You know, I’m doing okay. Things weren’t as great as I thought they were. I know that I can find better. I know that I will find better. I love them, I really do, but I don’t know if I can be in love with them anymore.

With acceptance remember that a break up is a good thing, not a bad thing. It didn’t work for a reason, whether that reason was yours or his. That means that you were in a relationship that wasn’t working, even if you were in love. A relationship with only love is not a relationship you want to be in because it will make you unhappy. Or obsessed.

The magazine said that you should dim the lights, get in bed, and tease yourself to a great orgasm. Basically, be your own fuck buddy. You are in control of your orgasm and you can have whatever you want, enjoy it. Me? I didn’t think that sounded like a good enough idea. It was too simple. Isn’t that just code for “masturbate, and make it good”? I think we all do that often enough, let’s get creative.

Last night I though I would expand on this idea. I had no plans of writing about it (and really only made this connection today) but I think some of you might benefit from trying it as well.

One, draw yourself a bath

If you don’t have a bath, continue reading but know I won’t be making any alterations for you. What I did was entirely in the bathtub and unless you have a giant rubber tub big enough to comfortable relax in you’re out of luck.

Two, make sure the bath is bordering on too hot. I like to get into the tub as it’s filling up with water so my body can adjust to the hot temperature. I have especially cold feet so getting into a hot tub all at once is too much for me. Filling it up around you let’s you better gauge the right temperature. Add bubble bath if you like, but I think it fogs the visuals.

Three, bring a toy.

The toy I used was a clear rubber dildo (veins and balls included) with a suction cup on the bottom. The suction cup would come in handy later on. It is preferable to use a toy that doesn’t have batteries if you’re going to be in the tub unless it is waterproof. Check, first!

Four, water proof lube.

When I started using the toy I wanted to see how it would work with no lube. While I knew that it was iffy I thought it would be fun anyways. No surprise- it doesn’t work. If you’re already aroused you’ll get the toy in okay but because the water washes away all your natural lubrication you’ll be sliding the toy against a raw pussy. Get some wet platinum or comparable waterproof lubricant and put that on the toy before you use it.

Five, water in the vagina isn’t fun.

It isn’t. I suggest scooting yourself up out of the water and putting the toy in and then getting back in the water. Feel free to thrust in and out once the toy is in you, but know if you take it all the way out and put it back in again you’ll get more water in the vagina. I find it pretty uncomfortable. You’ll get some regardless (those who haven’t played in the tub) but whatever you can do to slim that down is good.

So you’re in the tub and you’ve got your toy- so get to. Tease yourself, close your eyes, fantasize… go at your own pace. There is no one there that you’ve got to help reach an orgasm but yourself. Once you start to get close, stop and just lay back in the warmth of the tub. Go again, and stop again. Do this until you you find yourself too close.

At this point I sat up a bit and suctioned the toy to the bottom of the tub. This is *especially* awesome because it’s like you’re fucking someone in the tub- assuming your tub is large enough to do this. Go up and down a bit and enjoy, cum if you want to. It’s all up to you.

Once you cum fill the tub back up with warm water (it’s probably cooled off a bit by now) and relax. If you’ve got any energy left in you shave your legs, pussy, under your arms, wherever else… some exfoliating is always nice too. Hey, if you’re going all out to make yourself feel good you might as well go mini spa while you’re at it!

One thing that I found funny was that the water stayed warmer while I was masturbating than it normally does when I’m taking a bath. Body heat, much?

*Optional*

• Using the faucet to cum. Scoot down so your clit is under the faucet and turn on the water. Make sure the water is a good temperature first! Direct the water onto your clit and cum (fast.)
• Use a vibrator. While I think it’s more fun to use a toy and keep it inside you while you play with your clit some people prefer the battery powered vibration. If you like that, make sure it’s waterproof.
• Go for DP. Double penetration. Bring anal beads or a butt plug with you. Being relaxed and aroused with no interruptions is a good time to experiment.
• Fantasize. Really. Get dirty about it. You’re in the tub, you can get clean afterwards!

During my freshman year of college I took a pilates course. If you’ve ever taken a pilates course (or a yoga course, or something else similar) than you know that a large majority of the positions used in class are positions you can use or have used during sex. I found myself often unable to focus during these classes because it would either be arousing or a huge turn off. You also run the risk of exercise kegels (which piss me off- to be frank) in some of the positions. The benefit of taking these classes, besides the obvious flexibility, is being able to explore new sex positions. While one like in the picture might not be the most comfortable, being flexible allows you to lift your legs up higher, bend them further, and keep yourself situated as such for a longer amount of time.

I highly recommend taking a class like this to improve your flexibility, or working on it on your own at home in your spare time. Even if you’re not having sex it can improve your circulation and your posture and make you feel… good.

Do you find that your flexibility makes your sex life easier? Harder? Have you tried any especially bendy positions, and did you enjoy them?

I feel like watching some videos, want to watch some videos?

And so we did. The position to be reviewed (and I haven’t in such a long time) is a sitting girl on top one. I don’t believe that this one is detailed quite as such in my book so I will do my best to describe the alterations we made to it.

1. Boyfriend sits on computer chair naked (preferably with something under his butt to catch the sure to be semen) and gets hard if he’s not already.

2. Girlfriend (moi, in this case) sits facing the computer on hard cock. Goal? Watch pornography as long as you can without making boyfriend cum.

The extent of this position was rocking slowly back attempting to not cum. There are a whole wide range of positions like this but this one is one of my favorites. If you’re not a fan of pornography (or dirtying up your computer chair) you can do the same position on the bed or couch with the same effect.

Why it’s hot? Teasing yourself into orgasm (or attempting not to orgasm) can create a bigger buildup than you’re used to. The intimacy of the position (sitting on your partner very close) can also increase the emotional buildup. Oh- and you get to watch porn. That’s hot in itself.

Why it’s messy? When he cums things will shrink down fast, and because of the position he’ll slip out more quickly than if he were on top of you or you were on top of him while he was laying down. Put your hand down to collect any mess, and use that handy towel you put down to finish cleaning up the rest.